In The Happiness Project, author Gretchen Rubin talks about that dilemma.
"As a TV writer in Los Angeles, my sister works in a notoriously competitive, jealous industry. When a friend of hers cowrote the screenplay of a movie that was a box-office hit, I asked her, "Does it give you the funny feeling that your pal had such a huge success?"
She answered, "Well, maybe a bit, but I remind myself that 'People succeed in groups.' It's great for him to have a big success, and his success is also likely to help me be successful."
By contrast, I have a friend who described her brother as having a zero sum attitude toward good fortune: if something good happens to someone else, he feels as if something good is less likely to happen to him. As a result, he's never happy for anyone else. "
Which camp are you on?
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I've known many chamber musicians whose sole purpose was to finish in first place ;)
ReplyDeleteI'm naturally a bit jealous and competitive when my colleagues end up with gigs that I don't. But I try to use it as motivation to continue networking and improving my own skills. Plus, in my experience, having a positive attitude and being supportive of my peers has only brought positive results in the form of stronger relationships and subsequent recommendations!
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